Hide or Heal

Our Bayley loved bandaids. We put them on fresh "boo-boos", old "boo-boos", and none existence ones too. And if her dolls had an accident that may or may not have been caused by their little human friend, we put a few on them as well.

The boxes were full of Hello Kitty and Disney Princess goodness. I like to think of them as medicinal Cracker Jack boxes!

It made perfect sense to our toddler to place the bandaids all over her body. And since they were inexpensive pleasures, I bought a lot. The bandaids covered minor injuries and made Bayley feel better about what previously caused tears.

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There are numerous things that thrive when covered. And there are others that require exposure in order to be healed or in Lazarus's case .... come alive.

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“Lord, the one you love is sick.” - John 11:3

This was the message Mary and Martha sent to Jesus concerning their brother Lazarus. The scripture intentionally describes their relationship. He "loved Martha, her sister and Lazarus." - John 11:5

We could easily overlook the power in this verse. But let's sit with it for a moment. Three people with three personalities and struggles received the same unconditional love. That's good news! It means we don't have to mimic Martha, compete with Mary or compare ourselves to Lazarus. Jesus loves us for who we are.

".....we don't have to mimic Martha, compete with

Mary or compare ourselves to Lazarus."

Just a few verses later, the conversation takes an unexpected turn. "... he stayed where he was two more days". - John 11:6

Jesus waited. And by the time he arrived, Lazarus had been in the tomb four days.

As Mary and Martha met Jesus, they echoed the same desperate cry, "if you had been here our brother would not have died." - John 11:21

To be honest, similar sentiments escape my mind and slide right out of my mouth. Thankfully, Jesus isn't put off by such honesty. And even more so, he already knew the Father's plan to "awake Lazarus from his sleep." - John 11:11

However, the resurrection required participation. The mourners and bystanders had to roll away the stone. And so do we.

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Like our Bayley covering herself with bandaids, we become masters at masking. We hide our trials and traumas, as if pushing them in the recesses of our minds will cause them to disappear. They don't.

Instead they linger and decay. They "stinketh." - John 11:39. And what we thought was buried leaks on top of new places, things and relationships. It's a slippery slope that leads to disappointment.

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"How can I heal what you won't let me touch?" That was a question the Father asked during a particularly challenging season. It hit hard. A whole Selah moment. I was hiding what he was willing to heal.

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You don't have to answer out loud but, how many memories and traumas have you buried? Are you willing to show the Father where you laid them? Exposing our pain to him is a safe place and even though it doesn't feel like it, the uncovering brings freedom. When the stone was rolled away, Lazarus emerged from his grave healed and restored.

"God is our safe place and strength." - Psalm 46:1 -NLV

We're all presented with the same options. Either we hide and retreat into the shadows or we roll away the stone and embrace our healing.

Hide or heal. The choice is yours. But, hopefully you'll join me for a life lived out loud in the sun.

Your Sister Friend,

Facedown

It would be nice to have options as it relates to trouble. But to tell you the truth, even with a multiple choice scenario, I’d choose None of the above Every. Single. Time.

Unfortunately it’s not a matter of if we’ll experience difficulties … it’s when. John 16:33 makes it clear,.“we will have trouble”.

I’m not sure if anything could have prepared us for the insurmountable losses, shortage of every day necessities and the lack of fellowship 2020 threw at us. Yet there was more.

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The words in the Bible were blurred although not enough to raise concern. But when the stained glass windows concaved and disappeared in the center, I knew trouble was paying a visit.

A hole in the macular was the cause of the distortion. If the thought of inserting a gas bubble in my eye wasn’t enough, the recovery process was a bit overwhelming.

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As the surgery approached, we prayed for a miracle. The morning of, we did the same. But the situation and the remedy remained.

Non stop had been my mode of operation. The diagnosis created an unexpected pause and then everything came to a screeching halt. God was demanding my attention.

Honestly, I believe my vision was distorted for a few reasons. And, God was about to get me all the way together.

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Posture

Sit up straight. Shoulders back. Don't slump. Does this sound familiar? Studies say improving your posture helps maintain a stronger core. It enhances productivity and boosts our confidence and self esteem. The same is true when we align ourselves with God.

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My posture for healing was different. 45 minutes out of every hour I drapped my body over a facedown chair. Busyness had created distance between the Father and I. Bowing my head was the prescription for my eye but, it was also the posture of worship and surrender that provided long overdue soul rest. I needed time to hear. Slowing the rush made space for beautiful conversations.

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One Direction

The first few days I couldn't see anything. It seemed as if my left eye was under water which caused a great deal of strain on my right eye. The best option was to keep both eyes closed or look down. My gaze was set in one direction. Isn't that what Hebrews 12:2 instructs us to do anyway? "Look to and fix our eyes on Jesus the pioneer and perfecter of faith."

Distractions have a sneaky way of easing into our lives. And before we know it, the volume of the world becomes more prevalent than God's Word.

Being intentional about a God focused gaze gives us the reset we need. Does it mean we don't partake in every day activities or responsibilities? Absolutely not. It's just means God is our center and first priority.

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Position

The doctor reminded..."I can perform the surgery but the healing depends on you...on whether or not you stay in position."

That week my face, neck, back, shoulders, knees and bottom ached. Finding a place of comfort was difficult at best. Yet I stayed. What I thought I had to do no longer mattered. Everything waited while I waited.

I could have gotten off the facedown chair at anytime but, I wouldn't have gotten the desired results.

Can we just be honest? Staying isn't easy. Sometimes receiving the things of God require more than we want to give. The process comes with undesirables like pain and extended discomfort that tempt us to call it quits before the work is complete. In these seasons it appears that everyone else is moving on with their lives while we remain stagnant.

But instead of bemoaning the wait, I changed my perspective. I used the 45 minutes to plan, listen and rest. Podcasts and sermons became a whole thing. During the 15 minute break I executed what I planned and then repeated the process over and over.

The renewed mindset made the wait take on a whole new meaning. Instead of having to wait, I was given the privilege of waiting.

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As the days passed, the fluid decreased in size. On the last day of recovery I saw the bubble do a little dance in the center of my eye, float to the left and vanish.

We can't control what comes our way. There are places of uncertainty and times of indefinite waiting we all endure. But we can manage our responses. Adjusting our posture, staying in position and setting our gaze on the Father may or may not change our circumstances. But, it will cultivate a deeper relationship with God and that's what matters most.

Your Sister Friend,

Tune My Ear

Our journey usually began after the sun retreated from the sky. As we passed through the bright city lights to the calm of the country, we talked. Well, I did most of the talking. Daddy listened, asked questions and offered new perspectives. I loved our travel chats.

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Several years later, multiple strokes ravaged his body including his speech. It became difficult for him to communicate and even more so for us to understand. “Say it again.” was a phrase I said far too many times. Feelings of frustration and disappointment were not lacking. The silence was loud.

For years I’ve heard Mark 10:27 “…all things are possible with God.” So my prayer was simple. “God tune my ear to Daddy’s speech.”

Waiting for a miracle is well…you already know….so, in the mean time, I concentrated on the practical. When he spoke, I paused, leaned in and gave my full attention. Did the circumstances change instantly? No, it took a while. But somewhere along the way, the extraordinary happened. All of a sudden, I understood! It was as if I surfed past several static radio stations and found his voice.

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I wanted to understand my Daddy, but even more so, I long to commune with our Heavenly Father. Surprisingly, the methods are the same. The Lord speaks to us in many ways but, the burden of intentionality is ours. When we make the decision to pause and create space to hear, the doors of fellowship swing open.

Oh I know…there’s always something to do, someone that needs your attention or a deadline that has to be met. But when life kicks into overdrive, it’s a clear indication that we need to lean in and give God our full attention. What does that look like? Maybe it’s as simple as getting up fifteen minutes earlier for prayer, attending a local Bible Study or reading and memorizing scripture on your lunch break.

These little things seem insignificant, but they are well worth the effort. Just one word from the Lord is priceless.

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It’s been quite some time since Daddy and I had our travel chats. He finished his journey before sunrise not long after his birthday. It seems only fitting that he traveled with the night sky.

Thankfully our Father still speaks. Yet there are times when his voice seems distant, muffled and somewhat distorted. Does this sound familiar? Are you having difficulty hearing from God? If so, lets pray.

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Lord, I desire to hear and comprehend the words you speak. Please quiet my thoughts and help me become more sensitive to you. I welcome your truth, wisdom, encouragement and correction. Today I choose to pause and lean into your presence. Father tune my ear to you and drown out every voice that competes for my attention. Speak Lord! I am listening.

In the Name of Jesus, Amen.

Your Sister Friend,